447

On the way back to the car, Eleanor was looking pensive and a little sad. Jason slipped his arm through hers.

“You all right?” he asked.

“Oh, it’s an old pain, my dear, but it never goes away.  The last time I came here was with Bart.  Not long before …. he died.  And what your grandmother said made me think about how we keep on trying to force people to conform.  At such cost.”

“Yes,” he said.  “I’m sorry.  We shouldn’t have come.”

“Oh no, not at all.  Bart would have been glad we came.  I often wonder whether he would have got on with you.  I would have liked that.”

Jason remembered Bart’s diary, which, with all the dramas of the last few days, he had not read recently.  He resolved to read some more when they got home later.  It had been painful reading about Bart’s horrible life at school. About his loneliness, about the relentless mockery and bullying, knowing all the time what was going to happen.  But he owed it to Eleanor to read on, onto the end.  He owed it to himself too, because it was his own arrogance which had led him to desert Brent just when he was needed most.  And he would never be able to undo that.  What he had to do is try harder to be more genuinely compassionate and to care about his friends instead of seeing everything through a self-centred prism.  And Eleanor was his friend.

“Yes, it would.”  Impulsively he put his other arm round her and hugged her.

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Nikolaos' Place: Just lovin' ya

Nikolaos' Place: Just lovin' ya: Keith and Luigi, perhaps.

446

It was a perfect sunny autumn day, not too hot, with the trees in the countryside on the way to Healesville just beginning to turn, and leaves strewing the dry late summer grasses with splashes of colour.

Jason and his grandmother found the animal sanctuary fascinating.  There were kangaroos, stretched out on the grass, from the largest, the grey roo, through to small wallabies.  In a vast aviary, built outdoors out of chicken wire mesh and steel poles, they caught sight of wedge-tailed eagles, and in the darkened aquarium, though there weren’t many platypuses visible, they did see one or two darting across from one hidey-hole in the mud banks to another.

Jason could tell that his grandmother was starting to tire, so he was pleased when Eleanor announced that lunch was booked for 12.30 and they had better head off to the estate.

“So remarkable, animals quite unlike anything in the rest of the world it does make you wonder about God’s plan and all those fundamentalists who believe things should be the way they think and everybody else must conform I’m surprised they haven’t seen fit to declare platypuses and abomination laying eggs and with bills like ducks but still mammals Canon Green would find it most intriguing I must remember to write to him such a dear man but a little absent minded.”

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445

Lucasta and Eleanor agreed that a visit to the Healesville Animal Sanctuary would be interesting.

“Are you over your jetlag, grandam?”

“Such an interesting thing as if your soul is left behind no wonder primitive people mistrust lifts and cameras though the earth travels through space much faster than a jet doesn’t it and yet we don’t feel jetlagged but maybe we have a bond to the place we are like that Dr Thingumtight with his rituals and bright green turban so unflattering to his skin colour though lovely on an Indian or African I saw a few like that in Malaya lovely.”

“Is that a yes, grandam?” asked Jason, smiling slyly.

“Oh well yes of course I had such a lovely sleep and now I feel almost young again so nice but I want to write a letter to Parker though when she’ll get it is another question as she’s gone down to Cornwall with Mr Minim and I know it’s silly but I do worry about spring gales but I can write later so why not what fun.”

“The Domaine Chandon estate is on the way.  Perhaps we can have lunch there,” suggested Eleanor placidly.  “I’ll book, shall I?”

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444

“So what are you going to do?”

“I don’t know.  Maybe go to the Healesville sanctuary wildlife park.  Grandam hasn’t seen kangaroos.”

“Or platypuses. They have a huge pond with glass walls so you can see them swimming underwater.”

“Sounds cool.”

“Do you know how to get there?”

“No, but I ‘spect Eleanor does.  But maybe grandam is still too tired for an outing.”

“Well, you could drive to the Dandenongs.  They’re before Healesville, and they’re beautiful.  ‘Specially at this time of the year.”

“I’ll talk to them.  See what they suggest.  Will you need me at the pub tonight?”

“It would be handy between 9 and 11.  You knaow how busy it gets then.”

“OK.  I’ll see you at nine.”

“Noine it is.”  

He kissed Jason again, with tongue.  They drew apart, both of them aroused.  They simultaneously grinned in sheer delight.

“And of course, you’ll come back here afterwards.”  Jason’s eyes glinted.

“Naow.  I think I’ll laive ya to stew!” 

“A sadist as well as a perve,” mocked Jason. 

“That’s me,” agreed Keith placidly and went off to say goodbye to Lucasta and Eleanor.

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443

Jason closed the door after Cody and Luigi had left.  

“When have you got to go to work tonight, Key?”

“I start at one pm, today.  Tom said I could start later if I wanted, to spend some toime with you.  But I knaow he naids my work.  He hasn’t got anybody else.”

“He’s a nice bloke.  His bark is worse that his bite.”

“Yeah.  He a top blaoke.”  Keith met Jason’s eyes and didn’t look away.

Jason took Keith’s hand in his.  “I don’t mind that you love him or that you fuck,” he said softly. 

“I know,” answered Keith, his brown eyes warm with love and affection. 

Jason leaned in and kissed him on his cheek.  As he was doing it, over Jason’s shoulder Keith saw Lucasta come round the corner from the kitchen.   He startled, but Lucasta just smiled and swept off round the next corner. 

Jason felt Keith tense, and looked round just in time to see his grandmother disappear.

“That’ll teach you,” he grinned, lightly punching Keith’s shoulder.  “You perve!”

“You kissed me!  Will she …. Will it be a problem?”

“No. She’s grand in more than one way.”

“Good!”  And Keith pulled Jason into a tight embrace and kissed him.

And so, when Lucasta came out of the toilet on her way back to the sunny veranda, she was treated to the sight of two young men kissing.

So intense young love it’s good that Jason has found somebody— somebodies—to love but I wonder whether it will all last it did with Harold and me despite the secretary poor creature I was the one who kept him in the end until the end but how will these young men sort out their affairs so complicated all these alliances but I do think Jason looks happier that he did before he left England poor dear boy.

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442

Normally, Luigi preferred coffee, but if he drank coffee it had to be of the best.  And he couldn’t make it as well as the cafés on the street.  Tea was different.  Too many cafés used tea-bags instead of leaf tea, and he could make tea with tea-bags just as well and more cheaply at home.  And, anyway, he knew Cody preferred tea.  He took the mugs of tea and a plate of toast with butter through to the bedroom, and set it down on the bedside table.

Cody was still sleeping.  He kissed him on his shoulder.

“Tea?” he asked.

Cody rolled over to face him and opened sleep-drugged eyes.  For an instant fear filled his eyes and then he relaxed.  He smiled. 

“There’s hot buttered toast, too.”

“My favourite,” murmured Cody, stretching and yawning at the same time.

Luigi climbed into bed again.  It was chilly.  Winter was on the way.

After they had sipped their tea and eaten the toast, Cody said, “You know what’s wrong with eating toast in bed?”

“Nothing?” suggested Luigi, moulding himself more closely to Cody’s body.

“Crumbs,” disagreed Cody.  “They go everywhere.”

“I’m sure I can lick you clean,” offered Luigi, his eyes shining black.

“Insatiable!”  Luigi could see that Cody was making a determined effort to be happy, and he felt again melancholic.  He’d been through enough depression himself, and he knew how often one could rise out of the swamp only to be sucked back again.  It struck him that he had so often wished for Cody to return, and now he had, yet he still wasn’t happy, for new problems had arisen.

Trying not to show his sadness, he pulled Cody closer.  They would worry about tomorrow when tomorrow arrived.

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