He waited for her to answer. At last he said, “I know I haven’t had a man.” He waved down at his body. “Who would look at me?” Without waiting for a polite contradiction, he went on, “but I have talked and read and listened. I know so many blokes who’ve been fucked over by bisexuals who give them the spiel about everlasting love and all that stuff and then dump them for a girlfriend.”
Esmé was touched. And also a little peeved off. “Lukie bibbots, he hasn’t made any vows, he hasn’t said he loves me, he’s behaved impeccably.” Except for the stiffie, she added silently to herself.
“But you love him.” It wasn’t really a question.
“Of course I don’t.”
Luke just grinned at her.
“Then there’s the other problem,” he said.
He stared at her maddeningly until she was forced to say, tetchily, “What?”
“Falling in love with a straight guy. I’ve done it often enough. Some cute bloke. He just has to smile at nicely at you, and you construct a whole happy-ever-after story, visions of breakfast in bed, picnics on the beach, holidays in Paris.”
Esmé coloured. These were exactly the sort of things she’d been thinking.
“And then it turns out he doesn’t even want to have sex with you. His obsession is the girls he sees getting on the tram. The girls he lusts after in pubs. The pretties he ogles in the street. You are less than nothing to him. And you’ve invested all your time and emotions in him. And in the end you do have your stories. Only it’s just you on the beach at the picnic. Not you and him. And it’s not breakfast in bed. It’s a bowl of muesli with going-off milk. By yourself in the kitchen. With last night’s washing up staring malevolently at you from the sink.”
This made Esmé laugh but she was saddened too, for Luke and for herself. For the world. For all the lonely people.
Episodes 1 to 260 (without pictures, 10 episodes per chapter